Andar
Andar kya chal raha hai #
Teen baatein jo aksar in shabdon ke neeche hoti hain.
Ek baar jis wajah se ehsaas hua, aur ek baar is wajah se ki ehsaas ko kinare kar diya gaya.
Kuch logon ne bachpan mein iske roop sune: “Bekaar rona band kar,” “har baat dil par leta hai,” “tamasha mat bana.”
Neeche ek maanyata ban sakti hai: “Main zyada hi sensitive hoon,” ya “Bolne se baat aur bigadti hai.”
Reactions
Log aksar kya karte hain #
- Turant chhod dena aur kehna “haan yaar, shayad zyada hi soch liya”
- Zyada byore ke saath dobara samjhana, is ummeed mein ki is baar pahunche
- Shaam bhar chup rehna aur kahi gayi baat dohrana
- Agli baar kam batana, taaki taalne ko kam mile
- Baad mein net par khojna ki ehsaas vaajib tha ya nahi
Deck
6 cards mein poori kahani #
Chhe chhote cards, us pal se chhod dene tak.
Stand-up mein kandhe uchkana
HITEC City ka office, stand-up ka waqt. Aakhir aapke munh se nikal jaata hai ki ek colleague ki baat chubhi thi. Saathi kandhe uchkata hai: “Overthink nakko karo yaar, kaayko itna sochna?” Aur agla item shuru ho jaata hai. Sir apne aap hil jaata hai, par ehsaas jaata nahi. Us par ab ek doosri parat hai, jo kehti hai ki shayad ise mehsoos karna hi betuka hai. Aapki seat tak ka raasta pehle se zyada chup hai.
Taala gaya yaani ehsaas galat
Shabd ek aise niyam par girte hain jo pehle se ho sakta hai: “Koi kahe ki maine zyada socha, to mere ehsaas galat hain.” Ye vinamra lagta hai. Par dekhiye ye karta kya hai: ye doosron ko tay karne deta hai ki aapke ehsaas sachche hain ya nahi. Ab khud par aapka bharosa is par tika hai ki koi aur maane ki aapko wo mehsoos karne ka haq hai jo aap karte ho.
Humne bakheda na karna kyun seekha
Hum ise isliye pakadte hain kyunki aksar hamein bakheda na karne ko kaha gaya. Shayad ghar mein har baat par pareshan hone par aapko sensitive kaha gaya. Shayad aapne seekha ki ehsaas chhote rakhne se ghar mein sab shaant rehta hai. Niyam betuka nahi hai. Wo saath nibhane ki chaah se aata hai. Use dosh nahi, narmi chahiye.
Khud par thoda kam bharosa
Taala gaya har ehsaas apne par thoda aur kam bharosa chhod jaata hai. Aap jo pareshan karta hai, use batana band kar dete ho. Khud se behes karte ho ki pareshan hona bhi jaayaz hai ya nahi. Doston ke beech bhi akelapan lagta hai. Dheere-dheere apne hi ehsaas chhipane ki cheez lagne lagte hain, aur aaspaas ke logon ko asli haal kam pata rehta hai.
Kya unka faisla bharose laayak hai?
Khud se imaandaari se poochhiye: doosron ko tay karne dene se kya aapke ehsaas kabhi chhote hue? Ya zyadatar bhaari aur akele ho gaye? Ehsaas sahi ya galat nahi hote, wo bas hote hain, aur taal dena kisi aur ka faisla tha. Ek baar kandhe uchkana aapke ehsaas ka paimana nahi. Kya unke faisle par itna bharosa karna iske laayak hai?
Aapke ehsaas sachche hain
Chhodne ka matlab ye nahi ki taal dena naram tha. Matlab ye ki aapke ehsaas sachche hain, koi maane ya na maane. Aap dekh sakte ho ki kya laga, use khud seriously le sakte ho, aur jab mann ho, kisi sunne wale se keh sakte ho. Yahin se thoda chain lautta hai: khud se behes band hoti hai, aur ehsaas wahi reh paate hain jo wo hain.
If someone puts you down, threatens, hurts or frightens you for having feelings, that is something else, and worth taking seriously; staying quiet can be the safe choice.
Palat
Purana rule, aur try karne ke liye ek naya #
Purana ruleKoi kahe ki maine zyada socha, to mere ehsaas galat hain.
Try karne ke liye naya ruleMere ehsaas sachche hain, koi maane ya na maane.
Teen chhote din
3 din try kijiye #
- Din 1
Aaj ek ehsaas ko sirf apne liye naam dijiye
- Din 2
Ek aise insaan ko yaad kijiye jo achhe se sunta hai
- Din 3
Khud se behes karein to kahiye: “Ise mehsoos karna theek hai”
Is par baat karni hai?
“Jab wo shabd aaye, tab aapki baat kya thi?”
Free aur private. Shuru karne ke liye sign-up nahi. Chat isi sawaal se khulti hai.
Yeh deck jo kuch jaanta hai
Aur gehraai mein #
Yeh kaisa sunai deta hai, kahan se aata hai, iski kya keemat hai, aur ise dekhne ke doosre tareeke. Har sawaal par chat khulti hai.
Yeh kaisa lagta hai
Kya kaha gaya
Ek jhatpat line jo baat band kar deti hai #
Hyderabad, HITEC City ka office, subah saade das baje ka stand-up. Hafte bhar se jo baat atki thi, wo aakhir nikal hi gayi: client ke mail ka lehja kuch theek nahi laga. Saathi ne haath hilaya: “Overthink mat karo yaar, vehem hai tumhara.” Phir stand-up agle item par chala gaya.
Ye maa-baap, dost, colleague ya koi kareebi bhi keh sakte hain, aksar jaldi mein, kabhi halki hansi ke saath: “Zyada sensitive mat bano,” “dil par mat lo,” “rai ka pahaad bana diya.” Shabd kam hain, par abhi-abhi batayi gayi baat ko kahin jaane ki jagah nahi chhodte.
Aakhri baar kab ehsaas ko shabd diye aur dekha ki use haath hilakar taal diya gaya?Is par baat kijiye ›
Baad mein, jab kamra aage badh gaya, to uska kya kiya?Is par baat kijiye ›
Pehle kuch pal
Pehle hi second mein kyun chubhta hai #
Kuch logon ke chehre par garmi daudti hai, phir achanak shabd wapas lene ka mann karta hai. Kuch baat ke beech mein chup ho jaate hain; kuch apni hi awaaz oonchi hoti sunte hain, jab wo aur tezi se, aur byore ke saath dobara samjhane lagte hain.
Ehsaas batana ek chhota jokhim hai, aur kuch log turant bhanp lete hain ki wo suna gaya ya nahi. Usi pal haath hilakar taal diya jaana sharir mein darwaza band hone jaisa darj hota hai, soch shuru hone se pehle.
Wo jawab jo theek se samjha deta, aksar baad mein aata hai, lift mein ya raat ke do baje.
Us second mein sharir ne kya kiya, aur shaant hone mein kitna waqt laga?Is par baat kijiye ›
Yeh kyun lagta hai
Ye ehsaas ko jawab deta hai, baat ko nahi #
Ye shabd us baat ki baat nahi karte jo hui: mail, plan, lehja. Wo ehsaas ki baat karte hain, jaise ehsaas hi masla ho, aur is tarah asli baat mez par padi reh jaati hai, bina dekhi.
Isse do baar chubh sakta hai. Ek baar jis wajah se ehsaas hua, aur ek baar is wajah se ki ehsaas ko kinare kar diya gaya. Kuch log kehte hain doosri chubhan zyada tikti hai, kyunki wo sirf us shaam ke baare mein nahi, unke baare mein kuch kehti lagti hai.
Kuch logon ko dono chubhnon ko alag karna kaam ka lagta hai.
Kaun si zyada tikti hai: baat khud, ya taal diya jaana?Is par baat kijiye ›
Aur ehsaas taale jaane se pehle kis baare mein tha?Is par baat kijiye ›
Andar ki awaaz
Jab taalna andar se aane lage #
Kaafi suno to line andar aa baithti hai. “Kahin baat ko bada toh nahi bana diya?” “Kehne laayak hai bhi?” “Rehne hi dun shayad.” Kisi aur ko mauka milne se pehle ehsaas par sawaal uth jaata hai.
Kuch log dekhte hain ki ab wo bolne se pehle hi kaat-chhaant kar lete hain, sachchi chot ko “kuch nahi, bas chhoti si baat” bana dete hain taaki sunne mein achha lage. Doosra insaan wahan hai bhi nahi, phir bhi taal dena ho jaata hai.
Jab ye poochhti hai ki kehne laayak hai ya nahi, to awaaz kiski hai?Is par baat kijiye ›
Aapke apne sadhe hue faisle jaisi lagti hai, ya bahut pehle thamayi gayi line jaisi?Is par baat kijiye ›
Yeh kahan se aata hai
Yeh kahan se aa sakta hai
Kuch logon ke liye ye jaani-pehchani line hai #
Kuch logon ne bachpan mein iske roop sune: “Bekaar rona band kar,” “har baat dil par leta hai,” “tamasha mat bana.” Kuch parivaron mein tez ehsaas jaldi shaant kara diye jaate the, aur wajahein bahut alag-alag thin.
Kuch log ehsaason ke baare mein kisi niyam ko shuruaati saalon se jodte hain, kuch nahi. Dono tarah se ise dekha ja sakta hai. “Ehsaas chhote rakho” jaisa niyam tees ki umar mein bhi chal sakta hai, ghar badalne ke bahut baad.
Aapke ghar mein kaun se ehsaas ka swagat tha aur kinhe chup karaya jaata tha?Is par baat kijiye ›
Kisse poochh kar tay hota tha ki koi ehsaas ginta jayega?Is par baat kijiye ›
Iske neeche ki maanyata
Jad pakad sakne wala ek chupchaap niyam #
Neeche ek maanyata ban sakti hai: “Main zyada hi sensitive hoon,” ya “Bolne se baat aur bigadti hai.” Kuch logon ke liye aur dheemi: “Meri taraf ki baat ki ginti kam hi hoti hai,” ya “Chubha toh shayad meri hi galti.”
Aisi maanyataayein maanyata jaisi nahi lagtin. Wo swabhaav ke seedhe tathya jaisi lagti hain, jinhe log kandhe uchka kar apne baare mein keh dete hain. Isi wajah se in par dobara nazar daalna theek hai.
Kuch log aise niyam ko shuruaati saalon se jodte hain, kuch nahi. Dono tarah se ise aaj ke aaspaas ke logon ke saath dekha ja sakta hai.
Ye kin kamron mein ab bhi fit baithta hai, aur kinmein nahi?Is par baat kijiye ›
Iski kya keemat hai
Iski kya keemat hai
Ehsaas chhota rakhne ki keemat #
Iska matlab ho sakta hai “koi baat nahi” kehna jab baat ho, chhoti chubhnein bina kahe jama hone dena, ya koi baat uthane par hi maafi maang lena. Kuch log halaat ko apni nazar se dekhne par bhi shak karne lagte hain, un par bhi jo us waqt saaf dikhe the.
Mahinon mein nazdeeki thodi akeli lagne lagti hai, kyunki jo sabse sachcha hissa hai wo ankaha reh jaata hai. Doosron ko ek suthra, shaant roop milta hai, aur kuch logon ko bhare hue chehron ke beech bhi lagta hai ki koi unhe jaanta nahi.
Ye kamzori ki wajah se nahi. Ehsaas ko tah karke rakhne mein mehnat lagti hai, bhale kisi ko dikhe nahi.
Pichhle saal iski keemat kya rahi: koi baatcheet jo hui hi nahi, koi chubhan jo ankahi rahi?Is par baat kijiye ›
Agar yeh aisa hi rahe
Paanch saal aur, ehsaas chhota rakhte hue #
Kisi aam Tuesday ki tasveer banaiye, us din ki jab “main zyada hi sensitive hoon” zor se bol raha ho. Ye bas dekhne ki tasveer hai, theek karne ko kuch nahi.
Shayad subah stand-up mein tah karke rakhi gayi koi tippani, Slack par halka karke dobara likha gaya message, jawab mein type hua “no worries,” din ki koi baat jo ghar lautte safar ke liye rakh li gayi.
Yahan kisi cheez ka abhi jawab nahi chahiye, aur isse kuch badalna bhi zaroori nahi.
Usmein kya hai: baatein, messages, chhote kiye gaye ehsaas, ankahi baatein?Is par baat kijiye ›
Din mein kya bhara hai, aur kya kinare reh gaya?Is par baat kijiye ›
Us din ko dekh kar, agar kuch, to aapko kya dikhta hai?Is par baat kijiye ›
Ise dekhne ka doosra tareeka
Ise dekhne ka doosra tareeka
Ehsaas koi galti nahi #
Ehsaas koi ganit ka sawaal nahi jo galat hal ho jaye. Kuch logon ko wo kisi aisi cheez ke saath aata dikhta hai jo unke liye mayne rakhti thi: koi rookha lehja, bina bataye badla plan, koi mazaak jisne bahut purani nazuk jagah ko chhoo liya.
Ye “zyada” tha ya nahi, ye us sawaal se alag hai ki wo sachcha tha ya nahi. Ehsaas sachcha bhi ho sakta hai aur doosri nazar ke laayak bhi, aur inmein se kuch bhi us insaan ko kamre ka masla nahi banata jisne use mehsoos kiya.
Agar koi dost yahi ehsaas aapke saamne bol kar kahe, to wo aapko overthinking lagega, ya koi aisa insaan jisne kuch notice kiya?Is par baat kijiye ›
Aap use kya sunana chahenge?Is par baat kijiye ›
Ise jaldi pehchanna
Dobara dekhne par logon ko kya dikhta hai #
Jab log us pal par dheere se lautte hain, to kuch ko dikhta hai ki ehsaas kisi khaas cheez ka tha: mez par ki gayi tippani, ya aakhri waqt par chhoda gaya plan.
Kuch ko dikhta hai ki wo ek insaan ke ek vaakya ko apne ehsaason par aakhri faisla maante aaye the. Dobara dekhein to wo ek shaam ka ek jawab tha, aur ehsaas usse pehle bhi tha aur baad mein bhi.
Dheema karke dekhein, to aapka wala kis baare mein tha?Is par baat kijiye ›
Haal mein kin ehsaason ko baantne se pehle chhaant diya?Is par baat kijiye ›
Aur bina chhanta roop ek seedhe vaakya mein kya kehta?Is par baat kijiye ›
Isse sulah
Kisi ko manane ki zaroorat nahi #
Sulah ka matlab ye maanna nahi ki ehsaas betuka tha, ya doosre ke aakhirkaar samajh jaane ka intezaar karna. Matlab itna ki ehsaas ko sabse pehle wo seriously le jise wo hua tha.
Kuch logon ko halka lagta hai jab wo kisi aur ki muhar ke bina ehsaas ko ginna shuru kar dete hain. Wo sachcha, pehchana aur sammanit ho sakta hai, chahe nijee hi rahe. Kuch kamre sunenge hi nahi, aur unhe aazmana zaroori nahi.
Kaisa lagega agar apne ehsaas ke saath waisa bartaav karein jaisa kisi dost ke saath karte: pehle suna, baad mein tola, aur behes karke gaayab nahi kiya?Is par baat kijiye ›
Ek zyada sachcha vaakya
Paas rakhne ke liye ek sachcha vaakya #
Agar “main zyada sensitive hoon” saalon se baj raha hai, to usse seedhe ladne ki zaroorat nahi. Kuch log iske bajaye “maine kuch dekha, aur uska mujh par asar padna jaayaz hai” jaisi line taiyaar rakhte hain.
Shuru mein ye anjaani, thodi himmat wali lag sakti hai. Kuch logon ko lagta hai ki dheere se, baar-baar kahi jaye to purani ki thodi jagah le leti hai, khaaskar ehsaas ke taale jaane ke theek baad wale minuton mein.
Aapke apne shabdon mein sachchi line kya hogi, jo ye na kahe ki ehsaas bahut bada tha, bas ye ki wo sachcha tha?Is par baat kijiye ›
Kya rehne dein
Kuch cheezein bas mehsoos ki ja sakti hain #
Har taale gaye ehsaas ko samjhane ki doosri koshish ya ye faisla nahi chahiye ki kaun sahi tha. Kuch ko dekha ja sakta hai, poori tarah mehsoos kiya ja sakta hai, aur phir neeche rakha ja sakta hai, use chhota kiye bina.
Ye taalne wale se sahmat hona nahi hai. Ye chunna hai ki aapki taaqat kahan lage, aur kuch log kehte hain isse wo zyada thehre hue rehte hain, aur un baatcheeton ke liye jagah bachti hai jo khuli aur aasaan lagti hain.
Shaam bhar ke liye ehsaas ko neeche rakhne ka matlab ye nahi ki wo achha tha ya baat nipat gayi. Bas itna ki aaj raat ye baaki har cheez mein saath na chale, aur jab aap chahein, phir uthaya ja sakta hai.
Agar yeh dheela pade
Aur agar niyam thoda bhi dheela ho #
Sirf tasveer ki tarah sochiye ki niyam ek darja dheema ho gaya. Ehsaas tab bhi tola jaata hai, par pehle katghare mein khada nahi kiya jaata.
Chhoti cheezein kaafi ho sakti hain: bina maafi jode kisi ehsaas ko khud ke saamne naam dena, kisi dost ko teen baar ki jagah ek baar batana, ek shaam kisi ek jawab ko dohraye bina.
Yahan kisi se kuch kehne ki zaroorat nahi. Jo bhi aaye, wo aapka hai aur gaur karne laayak hai. Agar ise theek se dekhna chahein, to baatcheet bas ek tap door hai.
Sabse pehle kya alag lagta hai?Is par baat kijiye ›
Aapki pehli chhoti cheez kya hogi?Is par baat kijiye ›
Try karne ki chhoti cheezein
Try karne ke liye kuch
Kuch chhoti cheezein jo log aazmate hain #
- Ehsaas uthe to mann mein seedha naam dijiye: “Wo baat lag gayi”
- Chupchaap ek chhoti line mein poochhiye ki ehsaas theek-theek kis baare mein hai
- Andar ki awaaz “overthink” kahe, to palat kar poochhiye: ya bas sochna?
- Aaj ek ehsaas ko pehle kaate-chhante bina ginne dijiye
- Aaj ki ek chhoti si cheez par dhyaan dijiye jo aapne chahi, chahe kitni bhi chhoti
Chhote, nijee aur sab apni marzi se. Jo aasaan lage, wo aazmaiye.
Ek sawaal chuniye
Baat kijiye #
Kisi ek par tap kijiye. Dr. Thoughts ke saath chat usi sawaal se khulegi: free, private, shuru karne ke liye sign-up nahi.