Andar
Andar kya chal raha hai #
Teen baatein jo aksar in shabdon ke neeche hoti hain.
Chehra-mohra is baare mein bahut kam batata hai ki koi kahan paida hua, kahan bada hua, kahan apna lagta hai.
Kuch logon ne aisi baatein pehli baar school mein, nayi gali mein ya kahin pehle din suni, aur seekh liya ki ek chhota-sa itihaas taiyaar rakhna hai, jaise bus ke liye jeb mein khule paise.
Neeche-neeche ek maanyata baith sakti hai: “Mujhe apni jagah kamani padegi,” ya “Sabke jaisa banna padega, tabhi mujhe apnaya jayega.”
Reactions
Log aksar kya karte hain #
- Poora itihaas ek saans mein suna dena, taaki baat khatam ho
- Ek shabd mein jawab dekar baat doosri taraf mod dena
- Mazaak karke pal ko jaldi guzaar dena
- Nayi jagahon mein kai din tak khud ko dekha jaata hua mehsoos karna
- Baad mein us line ko dohrakar mann mein behtar jawab likhna
Deck
6 cards mein poori kahani #
Chhe chhote cards, us pal se chhod dene tak.
Colony ki dukaan par wo line
Bhiwadi mein aapki apni colony ki kirana dukaan. Dukaandaar khule paise lautata hai aur muskurakar kehta hai, “Aap yahan ke toh nahi lagte.” Aap hanskar kehte ho ki yahi ghar hai. Ghar lautte hue wo line baar-baar bajti hai, aur jin galiyon mein aap pale-badhe, wo achanak thodi kam apni lagti hain, jaise wahan rehne ke liye pass chahiye.
Jahan jao, apnapan saabit karo
Pehle saaf baat: us line se lag sakta hai ki aap yahan ke nahi, aur ye theek nahi. Par isi se ek niyam ugta hai, aur wo aapka ho jaata hai: “Jahan bhi jaun, mujhe saabit karna padega ki ye jagah meri hai.” Zyadatar log is par haan mein sir hilayenge. Ye taiyaari jaisa lagta hai. Par dekhiye ye karta kya hai: har naya insaan parikshak ban jaata hai, aur wo imtihaan kabhi khatam nahi hota.
Apnapan par sawaal kyun chubhte hain
Hum aisa niyam isliye pakadte hain kyunki apnapan par sawaal chubhta hai. Ye bahut insaani chaahat hai, aur aam bhi; zyadatar log iska koi na koi roop dhote hain. Shayad aapne ye kai baar suna hai. Shayad aap hamesha do jagahon ke beech mehsoos karte rahe ho. Jo bhi ho, apnapan chahna kamzori nahi. Wo ghar chahne se aata hai, aur use narmi chahiye, ilzaam nahi.
Har tippani ka judta bojh
Aisi har tippani thoda aur bojh jodti hai. Ye dheere-dheere hota hai, isliye pakad mein nahi aata. Bahar se kuch nahi dikhta, par aapko mehsoos hota hai. Nayi jagahon mein aap tan jaate ho, safaiyan taiyaar rakhte ho, apne hi shehar mein mehmaan jaisa lagta hai. Jin jagahon mein aapki yaadein hain, wo udhaar ki-si lagne lagti hain, aur imtihaan aap har kamre mein saath le jaate ho.
Kya saabit karna iske laayak hai?
Khud se imaandari se poochhiye: is niyam ko pakde rehne se kya kabhi ghar jaisa zyada laga? Ya zyadatar har kamra imtihaan ban gaya? Apnapan kisi ki shakl par nahi tika hota. Kisi ajnabi ki line ye nahi naapti ki ghar kahan hai. Ise narmi se, bina ilzaam ke poochhna theek hai. Iska koi galat jawab nahi. Kya is niyam ko itni kasakar pakadna uski keemat ke barabar hai?
Aapko pata hai ghar kahan hai
Chhodne ka matlab ye nahi ki line theek thi, ya aapko uska jawab dena hi hai. Matlab ye hai ki apnapan saabit karna ab zaroori nahi. Aap apna ghar bas jaan sakte ho. Ye ek baar mein nahi hota, aur zaroori bhi nahi. Chhote se, ek pal mein shuru ho sakta hai. Yahin se thodi shanti lautti hai: aapki galiyan aapki rehti hain, aur imtihaan aapke apne sir mein khatam ho jaata hai.
Being threatened, harassed, followed or frightened for how you look or where you come from is not okay and is worth taking seriously; a short answer or none at all is allowed.
Palat
Purana rule, aur try karne ke liye ek naya #
Purana ruleJahan bhi jaun, mujhe saabit karna padega ki ye jagah meri hai.
Try karne ke liye naya ruleMujhe pata hai ghar kahan hai. Mujhe pass nahi chahiye.
Teen chhote din
3 din try kijiye #
- Din 1
Ek ghar jaisi gali mein tahliye aur uska maza lijiye
- Din 2
Ek aisi jagah par gaur kijiye jahan aapko apnapan lagta hai
- Din 3
Line ke baad ek dheemi saans lijiye aur use jaane dijiye
Is par baat karni hai?
“Jab kisi ne kaha ki aap yahan ke nahi lagte, tab aap kahan the aur kya karne wale the?”
Free aur private. Shuru karne ke liye sign-up nahi. Chat isi sawaal se khulti hai.
Yeh deck jo kuch jaanta hai
Aur gehraai mein #
Yeh kaisa sunai deta hai, kahan se aata hai, iski kya keemat hai, aur ise dekhne ke doosre tareeke. Har sawaal par chat khulti hai.
Yeh kaisa lagta hai
Kya kaha gaya
Ek line jo pal ko jaanch bana de #
Bhiwadi mein colony ki kirana dukaan par khule paise lautate hue dukaandaar hanskar bola: “Aap yahan ke toh nahi lagte.” Kabhi e-rickshaw wale ne sheeshe mein dekhkar poochha, “Kahan se aana hua?” Kabhi office ke pehle din kisi colleague ne, kabhi shaadi mein bagal wale ne. Phir qatar aage badh gayi.
Vaakya chhota hai aur kuch maangta nahi lagta. Phir bhi sunne wale ko lag sakta hai ki jawab banta hai: kaun-sa shehar, kaun-sa school, yahan kitne saal. Ek aam-si qatar ya meeting bhi jaanch ban sakti hai.
Aakhri baar kab kisi ne kaha ki aap yahan ke nahi lagte?Is par baat kijiye ›
Us waqt aap kahan khade the?Is par baat kijiye ›
Pehle kuch pal
Log turant safai kyun dene lagte hain #
Kuch logon ko fauran safai dene ka mann hota hai: shehar, school, kitne saal, bina kisi ke poochhe. Kuch ekdum thehar jaate hain aur ek shabd mein jawab dete hain, ya mazaak karke baat taal dete hain. Pehle second mein ye sab ho sakta hai.
Dekhte hi chhaant diye jaane ko mann sochne se pehle hi “bahar wala” darj kar leta hai. Sochna aksar baad mein aata hai, ghar ke raste mein ya chai banate waqt, un sab jawabon ke saath jo zyada fit baithte.
Pehle kuch second bata sakte hain ki kya daanv par laga tha.
Jab kisi ne kaha ki aap yahan ke nahi lagte, uske baad aapne kya kaha ya kiya?Is par baat kijiye ›
Yeh kyun lagta hai
Ek nazar tay karne lagti hai ki kaun kahan ka #
“Aap kahan pale-badhe?” ek sawaal hai jo jawab ka intezaar karta hai. “Aap yahan ke nahi lagte” jawab pehle hi de chuka hai, ek nazar se, aur sunne wale par chhod deta hai ki wo use sudhare. Isiliye halke mein kahi baat bhi chubh sakti hai: faisla baatcheet se pehle ho gaya.
Chehra-mohra is baare mein bahut kam batata hai ki koi kahan paida hua, kahan bada hua, kahan apna lagta hai. Vaakya nazar ko saboot maan leta hai, aur insaan ki apni kahi baat ko wo cheez jise jaanchna hai.
Sawaal aur faisla sunne mein bahut alag lagte hain.
“Aap yahan ke nahi lagte” ki jagah aap kya poochha jaana pasand karte?Is par baat kijiye ›
Andar ki awaaz
Jab jaanch aage-aage daudne lage #
Kuch baar suno to mann mein ek rehearsal shuru ho jaati hai. “Poochhenge hi, pehle hi bata do.” “School ka naam jaldi bol dena.” “Chhota version taiyaar rakho.” Kabhi saamne wale ke bolne se pehle hi safai shuru ho jaati hai.
Kehne wala lift band hone se pehle aage badh gaya hoga, par rehearsal chalti rehti hai: nayi naukri ka pehla din is bhaashan se shuru ki aap kahan pale-badhe, kisi party mein sawaal ke dar se tankar jaana, koi naam bina poochhe samjha diya jaana.
Rehearsal ka ek director bhi hota hai.
Naye kamre mein jaane se pehle, aap kahan pale-badhe ki ye rehearsal kiski awaaz mein chalti hai?Is par baat kijiye ›
Yeh kahan se aata hai
Yeh kahan se aa sakta hai
Kuch logon ke liye safai dena bachpan se shuru hua #
“Nahi, matlab asal mein?” “Naye aaye ho?” “Ye asli naam hai?” Kuch logon ne aisi baatein pehli baar school mein, nayi gali mein ya kahin pehle din suni, aur seekh liya ki ek chhota-sa itihaas taiyaar rakhna hai, jaise bus ke liye jeb mein khule paise.
Kuch log aisi aadat ko kisi khaas pal tak pahuncha lete hain, kuch nahi. Dono tarah se ek nateeja chupchaap ban sakta hai: kisi jagah mein qabool hone ke liye pehle ek jaanch paas karni padti hai, aur wo jaanch bolne se pehle shuru ho jaati hai.
In aadaton ka aksar ek pehla din hota hai.
Aapko pehli baar kab laga ki kisi ke jaanne se pehle ye batana padega ki aap kahan ke hain, aur tab aap kahan the?Is par baat kijiye ›
Iske neeche ki maanyata
Ek nazar jo niyam chhod ja sakti hai #
Neeche-neeche ek maanyata baith sakti hai: “Mujhe apni jagah kamani padegi,” ya “Sabke jaisa banna padega, tabhi mujhe apnaya jayega.” Kuch log ek dheemi maanyata dhote hain: “Main kuch kahun, usse pehle log tay kar lete hain ki main yahan ka nahi hoon.”
Aisi maanyata maanyata jaisi lagti hi nahi. Wo taiyaari jaisi lagti hai, jaise barsaat ke poore mahine bag mein chhata rakhna. Isiliye ise kabhi-kabhi nikalkar dekhna theek hai.
Kuch log ise kisi ek pal tak le jaate hain, kuch nahi. Dono tarah se ise parkha ja sakta hai.
Kahan-kahan ye niyam ki apni jagah saabit karni hai ab bhi theek baithta hai, aur kahan nahi?Is par baat kijiye ›
Iski kya keemat hai
Iski kya keemat hai
Saal bhar safai dene ki keemat #
Iska matlab ho sakta hai: har pehli mulaqat ka itihaas ki class se shuru hona, nayi jagahon mein pehle se tankar jaana, rickshaw aur dukaan ki gapshap se bachna, aur ek mohalla jo kabhi poori tarah apna nahi lagta. Kuch logon ki ajnabiyon se baatcheet bina kisi ke chune dheere-dheere ghat jaati hai.
Ek dheemi keemat bhi hai. Har naye insaan ke liye chhota itihaas taiyaar rakhna mehnat hai, aur kuch ko lagta hai ki jagah saabit karne ko kaha jaye to wahi jagah udhaar ki-si lagne lagti hai.
Ye kamzori ki wajah se nahi. Aam jagahon mein chaukanna rehna thaka deta hai.
Pichhle ek saal mein safai dene ki keemat kya rahi: nayi jagahon, nayi naukri ya nayi galiyon mein?Is par baat kijiye ›
Agar yeh aisa hi rahe
Paanch saal aur, tankar pahunchte hue #
Kisi aam mangalwar ki tasveer banaiye, us din ki jab “saabit karna padega” wala niyam zor se bol raha ho. Aana-jaana, meetingein, chhoti-moti baatcheet. Ye bas dekhne ki tasveer hai, theek karne ko kuch nahi, aur isme koi bhavishyavaani nahi.
Shayad client meeting ki shuruaat is chhote bhaashan se ki aap kahan pale-badhe, poore auto ke safar mein kaanon mein earphone, padosi ke namaste ka jawab bas sir hilakar, team outing mein usi sawaal ke phir aane ka intezaar.
Yahan kisi cheez ka abhi jawab nahi chahiye.
Us mangalwar mein, jo us sawaal ki taiyaari mein beetta hai, jo baatcheeten shuru hi nahi hotin, unmein aapko kya dikhta hai?Is par baat kijiye ›
Ise dekhne ka doosra tareeka
Ise dekhne ka doosra tareeka
Yahan ka, par kiske hisaab se? #
“Yahan ka” ka matlab yahan paida hona, yahan bada hona, yahan rehna, yahan kaam karna, ya bas aaj yahan hona, kuch bhi ho sakta hai. Line ye nahi batati, aur nazar ko faisla bana deti hai. Bhiwadi jaisi jagahon mein bahut-se log hain jinki kahani sunkar nazar chaunk jaye.
Kuch logon ko line aur tathyon ko alag karna kaam aata hai. Dukaan ki qatar ya chai par kahi baat mein ek andaza hai; koi kahan rehta hai, kahan kaam karta hai, kahan apna hai, ye sirf wahi bata sakta hai.
Bahar se dekhiye.
Agar koi dost bataye ki kisi ajnabi ne kaha ki wo yahan ka nahi lagta, to aap usse us jagah ke baare mein kya poochhna chahenge jise wo ghar kehta hai?Is par baat kijiye ›
Ise jaldi pehchanna
Dheeme dekhne par kuch logon ko kya dikhta hai #
Jab kuch log us line ko dheeme dohrate hain, to ve dekhte hain ki kya pata tha aur kya andaza tha. Alag karke dekhein to vaakya mein ek nazar aur ek andaza nikalta hai, aur jisse kaha gaya uske baare mein bahut kam.
Kuch ko wo jagahein dikhti hain jahan koi nahi poochhta: wo kirane wala jo naam se jaanta hai, wo team jahan ye baat kabhi uthi hi nahi, wo dost jo maankar chalta hai ki aap yahin ke hain. Kabhi sawaal dobara aaya hi nahi, aur kabhi dar us insaan ya jagah ke baare mein sahi nikla.
Kuch jagahein jaanch karti hi nahi.
Aapki zindagi mein kahan aapko bina poochhe yahin ka maana jaata hai, aur waisa maane jaane par kaisa lagta hai?Is par baat kijiye ›
Isse sulah
Kisi ki jaanch paas karna zaroori nahi #
Sulah ka matlab ye maanna nahi ki ek nazar se tay ho jaye ki kaun kahan ka hai, na ye dikhana ki line chubhi nahi. Matlab bas itna ki ek qatar ki ek line ka, agli nayi jagah, nayi naukri ya chhoti-si baatcheet par kam chale.
Kuch logon ko halka lagta hai jab ve har naye insaan ko parikshak maanna chhod dete hain. Wo imtihaan kabhi khatam nahi hota, kyunki hamesha ek aur kamra hota hai. Jahan koi sach mein bura bartaav kare, wahan use gambhirta se lena theek hai, aur chhota jawab ya koi jawab nahi dena bhi chalta hai.
Ek tippani ko har naye darwaze ka mood tay karne ki zaroorat nahi.
Kaisa lagega kisi nayi jagah mein jaana, agar “yahan ke nahi lagte” wali line uska mood tay karna band kar de?Is par baat kijiye ›
Ek zyada sachcha vaakya
Naye kamre ke liye ek sachchi line #
Agar “mujhe saabit karna padega ki ye jagah meri hai” barson se chal raha hai, to usse seedhe behas ki zaroorat nahi. Kuch log ek line taiyaar rakhte hain: “Mera ghar kahan hai, ye kehna mera kaam hai, kisi nazar ka andaza lagana nahi.”
Ye shuru mein sach lagna zaroori nahi. Kuch log ise naye office ya nayi class mein jaate waqt dheere se kehte hain, aur purani line ki thodi jagah ye le leti hai. Kuch ko aisa nahi lagta, aur wo bhi theek hai.
Sabse achhi line aksar wahi hoti hai jo aap khud likhein.
Apnapan kahan hai, is baare mein aapka sachcha vaakya kya hoga, jise kisi ki manzoori nahi chahiye?Is par baat kijiye ›
Kya rehne dein
Kuch cheezein darwaze par hi chhodi ja sakti hain #
Ajnabi ya naye colleague ki har tippani ko sudhaar, itihaas ya agli baar ka behtar jawab nahi chahiye. Kuch ko dekha ja sakta hai, ek pal mehsoos kiya ja sakta hai, aur neeche rakha ja sakta hai, jaise ghar lautkar chaabiyan darwaze ke paas tokri mein daal dete hain.
Ye haar maanna nahi hai. Ye chunna hai ki din ki taakat kahan lage, aur kuch log kehte hain isse un jagahon aur logon ke liye zyada jagah bachti hai jahan apnapan par bhaashan nahi dena padta.
Shaam bhar ke liye tippani ko neeche rakhne ka matlab ye nahi ki wo theek thi, ya baat suljh gayi. Bas itna ki wo agli qatar, agli meeting ya agle namaste mein saath na chale.
Agar yeh dheela pade
Aur agar jaanch kam mayne rakhe #
Sirf ek tasveer ki tarah sochiye ki “saabit karna hai” wala niyam ek darja dheema ho gaya hai. Qatar bas qatar hai, aur namaste bas namaste.
Chhoti cheezein kaafi ho sakti hain: padosi se kahin bhi bhatakne wali gapshap, naukri ka pehla din bina kisi bhaashan ke, ya kisi nayi gali mein sair jo kisi bhi aur sair jaisi lage.
Yahan kisi se kuch kehne ki zaroorat nahi. Jo bhi aaye, wo aapka hai, aur gaur karne laayak hai. Jab theek se dekhna chahein, to baatcheet bas ek tap door hai.
Sabse pehle kya alag lagega?Is par baat kijiye ›
Agar kisi ki nazar tay na karti ki aap kahan ke hain, to pehla chhota pal kaun-sa dikhta?Is par baat kijiye ›
Try karne ki chhoti cheezein
Try karne ke liye kuch
Chhoti, nijee cheezein jo log aazmaate hain #
- Mann mein naam dijiye: “Lo, phir wahi bahar-wale ki jaanch”
- Gaur kijiye ki line mein kya nazar thi aur kya sirf andaza
- Ek aisi jagah yaad kijiye jahan bina kuch samjhaye aap apne lagte hain
- Apne shabdon mein chupchaap khud se kahiye ki ghar kahan hai
- Aaj ki ek chhoti-si cheez par dhyaan dijiye jo aapne chahi, chaahe kitni bhi chhoti
Chhote aur nijee. Jo aasaan lage wo aazmaiye, ya kuch bhi nahi.
Ek sawaal chuniye
Baat kijiye #
Kisi ek par tap kijiye. Dr. Thoughts ke saath chat usi sawaal se khulegi: free, private, shuru karne ke liye sign-up nahi.
- Jab kisi ne kaha ki aap yahan ke nahi lagte, tab aap kahan the aur kya karne wale the?
- Aap chahte ki koi naya insaan andaaze ki jagah aapse kya poochhe?
- Kaun-si jagah aapko bina kisi jaanch ke uska hissa mehsoos karati hai?
- Jis aam din “saabit karna hai” wala niyam zor se bole, aap ab bhi kya taal rahe honge?
- Agar ye niyam thoda halka ho, to sabse pehle aapko kya dikhega?